After about 1.5 years of blogging, this blog has gone noticibly silent.  Blame it on failed campaign promises, twitter, facebook, two kids, lack of interest, or what have you.  But the time has come for me to set this blog aside for the time being.

I started this blog originally as a way for me to journal some things that God was doing in my life at the time.  It was really meant to be personal.  Then it was discovered and I was outed as a blogger.  And people started reading.

But now I have decided to silence the blog.  I’m tired of writing for others.  I am ready to return this blog to its original intention – a private journal of what’s happening on this spiritual journey I’m on.  There are big things God is doing right now that aren’t quite ready to be public.  But when they are, I may open this back up as a public blog.  Who knows?

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I’m a consumer.

Nothing wrong with that.
I like nice things.
Shiny things.
Techie things.
Tasty things.
Did I mention?
I’m a consumer.

So. You want me in your church. Here’s how to get me.

1. Parking. I need lots of space for my big SUV. And it better be close to the doors. Don’t want to do much walking. So if it isn’t – how about a shuttle.
2. Nice Building. This is important. I’m not interested in some strip mall church that looks like it’s struggling. Or an old traditional church – unless you’ve done millions in renos. I’m an upwardly model semi-professional. I want my surroundings to reflect my importance.
3. Proper HVAC. This isn’t important. It’s critical. I want to be cool when it’s warm and warm when it’s cool. 68ºF to 72ºF – year round. Is that too much to ask.
4. Comfy chairs. And when I say chairs, I mean chairs. Preferably theater-style. With wide arm rests. Give me some space for my girth – and safe distance from the other arriving consumers.
5. Be punctual. I’ve already spent too much time getting me and the family ready and there for the meeting. Begin it on time. Have something cool playing on the big screens to entertain if we arrive a little early.
6. You’ve got an hour. Make good use of it. I want to be in and out in no more than 75 minutes. Maybe a few more if you’re serving decent coffee. Decent coffee that’s free, of course.
7. Music. Three songs up front. One fast (to get us going). One mid-tempo (to help us be reflective). End with a fast one (that tells us how much Jesus/God/the Spirit loves us – just no Jesus-Is-My-Boyfriend songs. OK!)
8. Announcements. Get them over after the music. Present them on your big screens so they can be done quickly. This isn’t a time to stick your B-team on the platform to give them some face time. And, unless Larry David is writing for you, avoid humor. Have the Final Cut folk edit your marketing stuff down to 15 second bites. If it works for Sony, it’ll work for you.
9. Offering. Now. It’s up to you where you put it. If the preacher is great, after the sermon might work better. If not. Go for the money after the announcements. (Maybe show some shots of starving third world kids in the last announcement. Heart-string-tugs work for Compassion and World Vision – why not your church.) “God loves a cheerful giver” and the Malachi 3 verses and the 100 fold blessing are important reminders. A good story of how tithing worked for someone would be great. No more than 90 seconds though.
10. Sermon. Twenty minutes. Did I make myself clear. 20 Minutes. 20. Twenty. We have the attention spans of gnats. Keep that in mind. Make it practical. If I wanted systematic theology, I would have gone to seminary. Use humor. Steal from the best if necessary. I want to leave feeling built up. And it’s a bonus if I can use the jokes/stories you told at work tomorrow.
11. Final song. Let the band rip on the last song. Feel good, happy-clappy works here. You want us wanting to come back for more next week.
12. Benediction segue. Let the band lay back and under as you Bless Us. Speak multiplied blessings over us – and then do a fast pitch for whatever product you need to sell. I did say. Fast pitch.
13. And then the band amps back up. This is the place for guitar or sax solos as we head out the doors to the shuttle bus or book store or free coffee. It’s okay to charge us something extra for Lattés.

Like I said. I’m a consumer. Oh. And a sort of a Christian. If you build this, I will come.

Or so you’ve been told.

*From www.kinnon.tv

Hello?  Just be authentic.

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I twittered Kamden’s birth knowing that it was the middle of the night, but that I could post it on here later as a record of what was going on.  Check it out (read it from bottom to top):

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Kamden Karise Ammons was born on 1-24-09 at 3:02am.  It was a little bit of a surprise since we were planning a c-section in 2 weeks.  But we’re so glad to welcome her to the world.  Check out photos on Facebook.

I’ll come back in my spare time and update with more.

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This morning I had the opportunity to speak at my church with my pastor (and father-in-law) in Omaha to meet Grace. Keeping with our theme of prayer in the new year, I shared out of James 5 on confessing our sins to each other and praying for each other.

“Confessing our sins” is about more than just telling our wrongs. It’s about discussing our problems, our needs, trials, tribulations. We are created for relationship – with God and with others and it is vitally important to our health (spiritually and emotionally) to have relationship with others. We are not in this alone.

We really do need each other to survive.  It’s like in LOST when Jack gave his “live together, die alone” speech – we need each other to survive, to help one another on this crazy journey of life – on this journey to follow Christ.

You can listen to the message here.

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Admittedly, I’m not much of a car guy.  I drive cars.  I have bought cars.  But I’m not really in to cars.  Just last week though, Alana and I finally purchased the car we have been waiting a very long time for.  After nearly 3 years of desiring this vehicle, we have finally bought one and we couldn’t be happier (except for the color – but hey it was a GREAT deal).

The 2008 Ford Taurus X sitting in our garage is only the latest in a string of vehicles for me.

It all started back in 1995 when my dad bought me a 1981 Pontiac Phoenix for $500.  It didn’t run and smelled like the little old lady who had before me had never emptied the ash tray.  But it was my first car.  My beautiful maroon first car.  I think Dad bought it as a father-son project to get it working condition, but I was less than interested.  Looking back now, I regret not spending that time with my dad.  At Lee High School (home of the maroon fighting Ganders), people knew my car because it was so distinct.  Because of its maroon color, it was a target during Lee-Sterling week.  It got spray painted blue and hammed.  That thing was indestructible with it’s 6 inch thick doors and heavy metal bumpers.  I think I hit two or three cars without ever causing a dent (to my car).

After driving the Phoenix for about a year and half and after it breaking down on me about the fifteenth time, I begged my parents to buy me a new car.  So down to Ron Craft Chevrolet we went to purchase number 2, my 1993 Mercury Tracer for about 4000 bucks.  This thing was a stark contrast to the luxury of the Phoenix, with no power windows, seats, locks, or even steering.  But it had 4 doors and a spacious trunk (that may or may not have carried a friend or two).  I had lots of memories in that car – everything from “clown carring it” home from football games to my first speeding ticket to getting assaulted through the window.

In 2000, I was tired of the tiny little Tracer and wanted to upgrade to an SUV since they were all the rage, so I bought a 1994 Ford Explorer that was smoking hot.  It was nice to have a roomier car with leg room.  Plus it came in hand as shortly thereafter I became a youth pastor/professional ride-giver.  I never told my pastor (or parents) at the time, but I could easily  cram 12 kids in the back with room to spare.  It was ginormous!  But she had issues.  After the head cracked (twice), the electical system catching fire, and a scary incident where my brakes went out in a roundabout at Hermann Park in downtown Houston, I decided it was time to shop for a more reliable car.

I couldn’t even “push, pull, or drag” my Explorer in as a trade; it was too worthless.  So I hitched a ride to Carmax in Irving, TX and bought my very first car on my own, a 2001 Toyota Corolla.  It was nice to just walk in, pick out my car, write a check (because I financed through Memaw) and drive back to campus in my sexy new car.  As I was driving back to Waxahachie, playing with all the bells and whistles (gasp! a CD player), I got a call from the salesperson.  They had not verified my check before I drove away.  Suckers!  After returning and me calling my bank, they were able to verify that in fact I did have a deposit made that day to cover the check.

In many ways, I still consider the Corolla my favorite car.  Suprisingly it has plenty of legroom for me, it’s fun to drive, and I like the way she handles.  Despite it’s year long bout with transmission issues, it has held up to be a great car that I still have and call “mine.”  During the year it was inoperable while we tried to scrounge up a way to fix it, I drove my in-laws’ 1995 Dodge Caravan.  This was by far the most ghetto vehicle I ever drove.  The students in our youth group would grumble whenever we had to take the “ghetto van.”  Not only was it, you know, old.  But the a/c didn’t work and the driver’s side door was white.  On a green van.  My best memory of this van is that it’s the car we took Jayden home from the hospital in.  I’m thankful to my in-laws for loaning us that car, but I’m much more thankful for them loaning us the money to fix up my Corolla.

And now we have the Taurus X which replaces Alana’s Chevy Lumina and it is wonderful.  Leather seats (we almost scored a deal for heated seats), low miles, and a great feel.  This will probably be the first car Jayden remembers.  It will be the car we bring Kamden home in.  We’ll probably take several road trips in it.  I’m sure I’ll have many more cars in my life, but this one will be memorable.

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Growing up in my family, Christmas was a big deal.  Our biggest tradition each year was that Shawn and I (and later Patrick) got one big present each and a smattering of other gifts from “Santa.”  The smattering were items like socks, school clothes, and toys.  But the big gifts were the big fancy expensive ones.  I think Mom loved to shop for those and she tried really hard to surprise with an amazing gift we would love.  Unless it was an unwrappable gift, we would save our big gift for very last as we ripped through all the others.

One year, I got a 10 speed bicycle that I totally wanted.  Too bad I fell off of it and into the pile of presents that Christmas morning.  Another year, Shawn got the original NES.  But Mom and Dad in all their trickery made Shawn think that the last gift under the tree was Mom’s.  I won’t tell you what happened next, but there were tears.  Eventually when Shawn came out of his room, he learned we did in fact get our very own Nintendo for Christmas.

Another Christmas, I had begged, bartered, and pleaded for a boombox with detachable speakers (yes, they were quite the rage in the early 90’s).  Each day after school in the weeks leading up to Christmas, I would sift through the boxes underneath the tree in hopes that “Santa” had delivered my boombox.  But there was only one box, about 4″ x 4″ x 6″ that was heavy enough to amount to much.  I had hoped it was a mini boom box of some sort.  Or at least a few cassette tapes.

On Christmas morning, I ran into the den and started ripping through all the clothes, socks, and underwear boxes to find myself with only present left.  As I opened it, my heart was pouding… how would I react if it wasn’t my boombox.  As I slowly tore away the paper, my hopes and dreams came to a sudden crash.  It was an electric pencil sharpener.  Yes friends, my “big gift” that Christmas was an office supply.

Don’t get me wrong, I love office supplies.  I can spend an unhealthy amount of time in Office Max.  But this was just plain wrong.  As my excitement turned into rejection, Mom began to open her last present.  Recalling Shawn’s agony only a few years prior, I pulled it out of hands and ripped it open to my find MY boombox.

While Christmas at the Ammons house was always fun – where presents and practical jokes were plenty – I learned at an early age that there is more to Christmas than receiving a big gift.  Christmas is about spending time with family, remembering the birth of Savior, and making memories together that can last a lifetime.

And so with my new family, I hope I can instill the same value and appreciation for Christmas.  I hope to bring in traditions from both my family and Alana’s so we can create wonderful memories for our kids.

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Here are some pictures that Donny and Tabitha took of us in downtown Junction.  Interested in your own really cool photos?  Check out Studio 208 and ask for the Ammons discount (but I doubt there is one).

Click the first picture to get started and keep clicking next.

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Just a little tease.  More coming up soon.

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And this is why sometimes I just like to sit and do nothing.

HT: AG Think Tank

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